When All Else Fails, Use YouTube!

I have been a bit absent from writing for awhile. Like a lot of this country, we have been getting a LOT of rain. I hate to even mention it because there are so many families that are dealing with much worse rain damage than we are.....much worse. I am simply explaining what has been going on with our family.

1. Our basement filled with water. Not a lot but enough to ruin carpeting & such.
2. Our ceiling started leaking. Boo.
3. Our air conditioning went out.

All of this happened during the middle of one of our home projects.....replacing our flooring in 5 rooms. If any of you have ever done a home improvement project, you know what it is like to live among that mess. Nothing is where is should be, and your routines are off. Especially when it's the bathroom....which is where our project was when this rain business started.

He hated the roofers making noise,
but he LOVED the dumpster! LOL!

So, the flooring has been halted & our attention has been turned to all things "de-watering." Calling people, taking bids, learning way more about my home than I ever thought I needed to know.....it's wearing & super stressful. But we are making progress. We have had the roof replaced & the gutters are next. This will take care of a LOT of our water issue...but not all of it. We have a couple of plumbing issues that need to be uncovered & addressed as well. Baby steps, right?

Well, that is all things house related....only one portion of our life. We also have Ethan's birthday in 3 days...which I have done ZERO shopping. Oh...his birthday party too....I've done nothing. Mom of the year...right here.

Puzzle Piece Rewards System

Weeks of sticker charts!
DLTK's Custom Chore Charts!

For a long time, we have been doing the typical sticker chart to encourage Ethan to use manners, maintain good hygiene and become more independent. After a sticker chart was completed, Ethan would get $1 for his bank. That worked for awhile but then the novelty wore off. Getting a sticker for brushing his teeth was no longer worth it to him....and the battles returned.

So, we began to up the ante! Each night, we would count his stickers & he would earn 1 coin per sticker. And when his sticker chart was full, he would still earn a dollar.

Want to know a secret? I would just re-use coins already in his bank, so it didn't cost us any extra money. Shhhh....don't tell Ethan!


Well, that worked for awhile, but soon that began to wear off too. The battles were beginning to start again....fighting to brush teeth, fighting to self dress, and I was losing my currency with Ethan!

24 piece puzzle from Dollar General. 

And, once again, the Changing Challenging Behaviors Workshop from Easter Seals came through for us!!! Ms. Dona, leader of the workshop & Ethan's ITAP program, showed the class several strategies & examples. Corey & I immediately knew that we had found our solution.....puzzles.

How do puzzles work in place of a sticker chart? For every demonstration of desired behavior, Ethan earns one puzzle piece....instead of one sticker. Once Ethan has completed a puzzle, he gets to pick a prize/toy out of the prize bin I've put together. Things from the dollar store, happy meal toys, garage sale finds....nothing that costs more than $1 each. ETHAN LOVES IT!!!!

In the middle of a puzzle!
Almost time for a trip to the prize bin!

It has been working longer than anything we have tried before! He loves gaining a puzzle piece, loves putting the puzzles together, loves digging for toys in our prize bin! Initially, I was cutting up the cardboard boxes of his fruit snacks, cereal, pop tarts, and other recognizable logos. But once Ethan got the hang of it, we needed to go to more puzzle pieces so he wasn't earning a toy EVERY day. 

I am thrilled to report that this is STILL going VERY well, and he loves earning puzzle pieces!!! Now our battles are diminishing! Picking up toys, brushing teeth, turning off the computer, trying new foods, behavior in new places, and other issues are able to be a managed so much better with this new form of "currency." HOORAY FOR PUZZLES!

Autism Christmas Resources

As I have said before, I love holidays......all of them! But Christmas is such a special time of year, and our family is already deep in Christmas festivities! However, this time of year brings lots of "non-typical" activities that we need to prepare our kiddos for in order for them to experience the warm feelings of Christmas.....instead of being terrified of the unknown!

I subscribe to many newsletters, and one of my favorites is Sandbox Learning Education Tools. I found them when looking for social stories, and they even have a free one about "waiting".....a common difficult concept for kiddos with autism to understand.

Well, today in their newsletter, they emailed me Strategies for Challenging Holiday Situations. It is a wonderfully concise article about things we can do to help our kiddos prepare for the new things that come up during the holiday season. Definitely check it out!!!! Maybe even print it & hang it on your fridge!!!!

Here is another link to a lot of free social stories....It's called KIDS CAN DREAM AUTISM WEBSITE! A very talented girl named Heather writes them & started this website because her 2 brothers have autism, and she wanted to help them & others! How awesome!

Not only are there changes at home during the holidays, but at school as well! Here is a great list of ideas for teachers as well as parents to help children with autism during the holiday season.....and after when it's time to get back to the typical routine! MAKING THE HOLIDAYS HAPPY FOR CHILDREN WITH AUTISM SPECTRUM DISORDERS.

And lastly, here are some great tips on how to handle specific situations.....traveling, shopping, family dinners, worship services, etc...Handling the Holidays with a Child on the Autism Spectrum.

These are much needed resources for parents/teachers/guardians of kids on the spectrum, but I think these ideas would be great for any kiddo! I hope you find them as useful as me!!!! Merry Christmas!!!

Condensed Weekly Schedule

I talk & post a lot about visual aids. They help our family in so many ways. However, I remember hearing at one of our conferences (sorry I can't remember which one) that visual aids are a supreme resource for kiddos on the Autism Spectrum, but our goal is to eventually have them be able to cope without it. Now, I know of some people, myself included, who would be LOST without certain visual aids. My watch, my calendar, my weather app on my phone, and my many lists. Without these few visual aids, my days would be more frazzled than they already are!!!! So, Ethan needing visual aids to reduce his anxiety.....I totally get that.

But since I post about his visual aids often, I also wanted to point out that we don't still use many of them. Once Ethan has understood the concept or schedule or whatever we are trying to teach him, we notice that he will do a couple of things. First, he will use the visual aid more as a "that's what I'm supposed to do" or "I'm having fun with this game" instead of using it to actually learn. We can tell he is doing this because he isn't really looking at the visual aid but instead is "going through the motions" without even really looking at the tool. Second, he will begin to use the aid in this same way but more randomly. Some days he will look at it, other days he won't. Eventually, we realize it has been weeks since he has needed the resource to calm his anxiety.

For instance, at the beginning of the school year, we had these visual aids to help Ethan understand what his school schedule was to be like...for more on these visual aids, you can find the original post here.

However, now these things have disappeared. I have been able to condense it all to one page.

He has also started looking at my write on/ wipe off calendar that I keep on our refrigerator. And just before bed each night, Ethan will ask me what we are doing tomorrow. I try to keep it less than 5 words....for instance, on Wednesday will will do "Easter Seals, School, Home, Church." I could easily add images onto our visual organizer if I need to but because Ethan is so word/text driven, pictures seem to be unnecessary for him.

Here are a few other links to visual aids that we have used in the past....that we no longer use.

Getting Up in the Middle of the Night visual aid

Driving to a New Location visual aid

PottyTraining visual aids

However, the challenge is that, even though Ethan has outgrown many of his past visual aids, the need for new ones will soon come again. And that is always the challenge with parenting all children....staying one step ahead of them!

Back to School Visual Aids

Back to school time is like an unofficial holiday...it fills the aisles of the local stores, there are TV advertisements for it everywhere, it consumes so many conversations, and on & on. And just like all the other holidays, my house has been converted to fit the theme! Not with decorations, but with new visual aids to help Ethan (and the family) prepare for our new adventure. Here are the Back To School Visual Supports that you will find around my house....

First, is something that we use EVERY DAY. It is Ethan's daily schedule...although Daddy likes it too. It lets them him know what the day's events will be so there are no surprises. If something were to change, Ethan does very well at handling that, too....as long as we keep that iPad picture on there. :0) For more info about this visual aid, read Daily Schedule.

These envelopes are full of other pictures that I can use as needed. If we get a new toy, I add a picture card. If we are going somewhere new, I either add a new picture card or use our card marked, "Special," and use a website or youtube video to further show Ethan our new activity. I did this when we went to Monkey Joes and The Children's Museum this summer.

This second one is a new one. I got the idea from online somewhere, but I LOVE IT!!!! Each day, I was writing what we needed to take with us for the day on a write on/ wipe off board. And every night, I would have to plan out what the next day was going to look like so I could get everything down on the board before Ethan woke up the next morning. Ethan LOVES lists (that's my boy!), but mostly he LOVES to cross things off the list! Finally, I got smart & typed up one sheet of paper for each day of the week. Then, you slide the paper into a protective sheet cover and use a dry erase marker to cross off or write on your list! It works great! Ethan loves it, and I can save myself some precious brain power! WOOHOO!

Here is what it looks like once Ethan has found & crossed off everything on our list. After Ethan goes to bed, I wipe off the marker, slide in the next day's page, and we are ready for the next morning!!!

 

And I couldn't resist but post a few pictures of Ethan on his first day of 4-year old preschool!

He loved his sign so much that he carried it all the way to school! Happy Back To School Everyone!!!!

Independence Day

If you ask me to pick my favorite holiday, I couldn't give you an answer. I love them all. I get excited for each & every one! Just like the four seasons...I love them all! One of the reasons why I love living in the mid-west is so I can experience all of the seasons. However, if you asked me which holiday makes me the most nervous for Ethan???? It would be the 4th of July, for sure. The typical cook-out food....he doesn't eat. The loud fireworks & firecrackers....it pushes him to the brink. And talk about a day off of a typical schedule! So....how do we still get to enjoy our Independence Day? Here's how we did it this year....

First, after a bad experience last year, we decided to keep it pretty low key. Me? I want to do it all, see it all, fit it all in! But, wanting to have my family enjoy this day as much as me, I have to adjust. So, we tried to make it as close to a Saturday-type schedule as much as possible. Plus, now that Ethan is really using his picture schedule, we were able to prep him for the day ahead. We spent most of the morning & early afternoon at home. We swam, had a cookout (Ethan ate his chicken nuggets, but outside with us), and Corey bought non-noisy firecrackers such as sparklers & growing black snakes.

Then, late afternoon, we went to my brother-in-law's grandparents house to swim with their family. They have a "real" pool, and Ethan had so much fun going down a small slide into the pool. Over & over & over again. We were even able to get him further along in his swimming skills though he still can't swim yet.

After that, we went home for a quick dinner & got ready to head out to the fireworks. This is the dreaded part. Last year, during the fireworks display, we changed our viewing location to as far away as possible so the noise wouldn't be as loud for our noise sensitive kiddo. However, Ethan was still so afraid of the sound, that he literally peed through his diaper & onto Corey (even though Ethan had ear plugs in). So, we were a bit worried. It had been a year ago, and Ethan is able to handle noise so much better now......how would he do this year? Should we even attempt it? Should we stay home & watch it on tv? Hum??????

Well, we decided to go & if we needed to leave early, we would. Plus, we were meeting some friends & my sister's family there, so Ethan could at least play with some other kiddos before the fireworks started...even if he didn't make it through the display. It was SOOO hot, but here is how it went......

Ethan is trying out his headphones & wearing one of his favorite light up toys. I think he looks a bit like an air traffic controller!

Aunt Rachel brought more glow toys! Say cheese!

 

As we waited for it to get dark, Uncle Scott was playing catch with the kids. Without being told, Ethan went over & lined up with the other children....see him on the far left?

Here, you can see Ethan is now watching what is going on....

And eventually, he got IN the line & was playing catch too!!! Unfortunately, I took this picture just as a practice firework went off, and Ethan is covering his ears. But he was playing catch with the other kids & WITHOUT being told to do so!!!

The fireworks have started!

This year, we have Ethan sound-proofing headphones, and he did GREAT!!!! In fact, he was laughing at them!!!

The city does a ground show that you can see if you get in the arena, but we could still see a lot of it from where we were sitting. These are the ones that Ethan really liked.

Ethan watching the ground show.

When the fireworks would go off up in the sky, Ethan would cover his eyes & peek through them....kind of like watching a scary part in a movie. But he never cried or got upset! He just kept laughing!

 

I brought this pop up tent for the kids to use as a bathroom, so we didn't have to walk to one.

However, Ethan & his cousin (who also doesn't like loud noises), climbed in here to watch some of the fireworks. It seems that "hiding" either in a tent or behind sunglasses/hands eases the loudness of the noises. Glad we brought it!!!

Part of our group watching the fireworks!

Ethan & I watching the fireworks. I was so happy that we didn't have to leave early!

What a great Independence Day!!!

Sleeping & Map Updates!

I recently talked about how Ethan was entering a new phase of getting out of bed on his own in a post titled A New Sleeping Challenge. I LOVE that he has this new independence, but we were very worried for his safety. One morning, I woke up to....what I thought was....a prowler in our basement. When I got up to investigate, I realized that Ethan wasn't in his bed. I instantly went into crazy mama mode thinking someone was taking my child. As I quickly & non-rationally made my way through the house, I was met on our basement stairs by a very scared Ethan....who was crying & said to me, "Oh Mommy! There you are! I lost you!" Not only was I super sad that he thought he lost me, but our basement at the time was in no shape for him to be unsupervised due to us converting it into a sensory playroom (update on that later this week). This sent us into action that day.

A couple of weeks prior to this, Ethan began a summer preschool program at Easter Seals. The drive is about 35 minutes, and he would get very anxious on this "long" drive. So, I came up with the idea to give him a map to help him realize where he was at in his journey. You can read more about this on my post titled Maps. Since that first map, we have created many more, and we now have a variety for Ethan to choose from....although he loves to receive a new one.

Who knew that these two situations would collide?! In order to help Ethan understand what he should do if he gets out of bed before his parents (which is happening nightly....about 3am), my husband built off of our map idea! Since he does the bedtime routine and is excellent at explaining things to Ethan, he introduced Ethan to his new bedtime map. Corey also does vinyl work as a hobby so he used a couple of leftover pieces to cut out shapes for our floor & create a path for Ethan to follow....just like on his map! (Stickers or colored tape would work too!) It's hard to explain in words, so here are a few pictures....

Here is our collection of Maps to get us to Easter Seals. Ethan will play with these even on days when we don't have class!

Here is Ethan's nighttime map. It's very worn because, again, Ethan will play with it during the day. It leads Ethan from his racecar bed, to the bathroom & then to our bedroom to find me. Notice the white stars & the orange circles.

Here, Corey laid out a path of white stars from Ethan's room to the bathroom & then orange stickers from the bathroom to our bedroom.

A closeup of the sticker paths.

We also installed extra locks on the doors that we don't want Ethan to get into....we placed them high enough so even with a step stool, Ethan can't reach them. We did this the day we found Ethan in the basement. I'm just so glad he didn't go outside!

This nighttime map has been working GREAT! In fact, I don't even think he uses the map anymore....he knows what to do now. But he still likes to play with it during the day.....line his cars up on the paths or practice the routine. I'm not quite ready to remove this visual aid quite yet, but that is more for me....I don't want to find him crying & scared because he can't find me!

He is still getting up in the middle of the night most nights, but we just pull him into our bed....which may be why he is doing it. :0) But, in a weird way, I almost sleep better after he comes in....I know where he is & know he isn't roaming the house. Eventually, we will have to put him back in his bed....I know that will be the next step.....and then maybe he will stop getting up in the middle of the night....who knows. But until I know things are cemented into his mind as to what to do in the middle of the night, I am more concerned about his safety & knowing he is ok....even if that means more cups of coffee during the day.

Daily Schedule

OK.....so this isn't really an UPDATE....more of a "update my camera/forgot to post about" kind of thing!

This is a daily schedule that I use with Ethan. I have used it for about a year now, and his interest/need for it comes & goes. The blue pocket chart is an used one from my sister, who is also a teacher. Most of the daily picture cards come from tipjunkie.com....one of my favorite blogs. These are free to print & there are a LOT of them! I have also made a few of my own....mostly pictures of family members or local places to visit.

This is great to use with ANY child, but especially a child with anxiety. This helps them to know what is expected of that day....no surprises....or at least very few. When the activity is over, Ethan will turn the card around.  Eventually, I would like to add times to this....once Ethan is ready to tell time (which he could probably do now, but Mommy isn't ready to take that on just yet). But maybe adding a sun/moon would help a child realize when these things will happen. That this isn't just the next HOUR, but the entire day.

Here is a typical daily schedule at our house.

I have additional cards in the 4 envelopes. The Days Of Summer come from PluckyMomo.com. It's a ton of summer boredom busters for summer, and it comes in a free printable! The 4 pictures shown here are the toys that I "get out" for Ethan to play with...Cars is a constant that Ethan insists on showing on the schedule. These are in addition to all of his already accessible toys. I try to have at least one thing for US to do together (Flashcards &/or Coloring) & ONE OT thing...this day it was working on fine motor skills with the Light Bright.

This is the schedule for the day. PLAYTIME is where he plays with the toys shown above. He is always excited to see what "new" toys he gets to play with that day. One day, Ethan brought me a few picture cards (like singing), and said, "Mommy, these are the things I don't like." It was awesome to have him tell me what he didn't like/want to do!!! We still did it, but for a short time.

Last Saturday, Corey let me sleep in. When I woke up, I found Ethan setting up his schedule for the day.

He got down all of the envelopes & was putting as many things on the board as he could!

Here is Ethan's day....looks like we have a lot to do! HAHA!

Pool Therapy

I was so nervous about purchasing a pool this summer. I knew it would be good for Ethan, and I knew that the cost/availability was better than paying the fee at our local pool......but I was still nervous about this purchase. However, I'm so glad we did it. The reasons we bought it are confirmed just about everyday.

One really exciting thing is how it is helping Ethan's muscle development. I often say that I feel as if I'm trying to create a body builder because I am always trying to find ways to incorporate "muscle" work into our everyday activities. One reason is because he craves that in order to be calm & relaxed....part of his sensory diet. Another reason is because he really needs to develop his muscles. One particular group of musclse that I tend to focus on are his shoulder blade muscles. If you lift your arm up & down, you will feel those muscles moving around your shoulder area.....these are muscles that help with handwriting & fine motor skills. These are areas that Ethan struggles with partly because those muscles are weak. So, I try to do things that will help strengthen them. When I do laundry, he pushes my basket down the hallway (and he loves to do it!). Playing with Playdoh, silly putty & other kinds of these molding clays are really good for this as well. And, a big reason for the pool purchase, swimming will help with a lot of muscle development but especially those shoulder muscles.

So, I stumbled across a pool game that makes Ethan laugh & laugh (he loves it!), but it also helps those muscles. We have one of those dollar store kick balls. Because it has air in it, it is difficult to hold under water. And when you do manage to hold it under water, and then let go, it flies up out of water. Ethan can't get enough of this! The first day I did this with him, I had to do hand over hand with him to hold the ball under water for a 3-count. The next day, he was doing it by himself....easily. The day after that, he was doing it for a 10-count....all his idea. Yesterday, Daddy showed him how to put it under water & between your legs so the ball pops up out of the water behind you. A new kind of hilarity was reached that day.

We have also noticed that Ethan isn't as clumsy when he walks & he is calmer during the day. This has been so good for him, and I'm so glad we did it. Here is a video of Ethan playing this new game!

Maps

Ethan's 4th birthday will be this month. Every year, my very talented artistic husband makes Ethan's cake based off of what interest Ethan is into at that point in time. The last 2 years.....we have had car themed cakes & parties. I was REALLY hoping that this year we could do something else! So, I have been randomly asking Ethan which he would prefer....and then giving him 2 options. Up until about 1 month ago, he would pick cars, Nascar, or Disney Cars every time. Until one day, when choosing between Dora & Lightening McQueen.....he picked DORA!

Dora is a new-to-us show that we watch, and he really likes it. But, I am already envisioning having to apologize to 18 year old Ethan that I let him have a GIRL (said in that "girls are gross & have cooties" voice) for a birthday cake. Ethan, are you sure you don't want cars?! HAHA!

Soon after that, however, I noticed something. He started constantly wanting to play the Jake & the Neverland Pirate Games...both on the iPad and the computer. Then, as I watched him play one day, it hit me....it's not the characters he likes.....he likes that these videos/games follow & use MAPS! Dora is constantly pulling out "the map" to complete her goal, and Jake typically has a map to a treasure!

OK....this he TOTALLY gets from me! I, too, have always enjoyed reading/making/following maps. On road trips, I was the map reader/navigator.....and I loved it! So, this realization gave me an idea to help Ethan out with some of his anxiety.

Earlier this week, we drove to our closest Easter Seals branch....about a 35 minute drive. That doesn't seem long to me, but to a 3 year old....that seems like FOREVER! The entire trip, he kept wanting reassurance of where we were going. Eventually, either from being tired of saying the same thing over & over to him or because the light bulb finally went on in my head, I picked 3 noticeable landmarks for him to look for that were on the way to Easter Seals. This worked great, and he was even laughing whenever he would "find' the next landmark.

So, before we left for our 2nd day of our Easter Seals summer preschool, I quick sat down with Google images, and created a super simple map for him to have in the car. OH MY GOSH! HE LOOOOOOOVED IT!!!! He was having so much fun looking for the next thing, and his anxiety about a long car ride was gone! It was just plain fun! I guess I will be making a few more of these to have on hand for our car rides this summer!

Here is the simple map. I picked several things that were on the way to Easter Seals & did a quick "route." Next time, I will need to add labels to the pictures as well as our house for the start....such rookie mistakes!

Here is Ethan reading the map! You will hear him throw in a few memorized phrases from several of his "map" games. But, hey, we are communicating!

Road Trip

Last weekend, my dad graduated with his Doctorate of Ministry degree. He has been working towards this goal for as long as I can remember. I remember going to his graduation for his Master's degree when I was in high school....that was more than 10 years ago. Well, I was NOT about to miss this momentous occasion.

The question was whether or not to take Ethan. Traveling long distances with Ethan in the past has not been the easiest. It is hard for him to sit for that long. But we decided that we should try. So, being the annoyingly organized & plan ahead type, I got to work. I was reading & doing all I could to prepare for the trip. I bought & wrapped dollar store toys for Ethan & his cousin to open every hour (or as needed). I bought new DVDs of Dora (his new favorite show) in order to keep him entertained. I packed an abundance of OT items. I even got some great advice from the mom's at our church's weekly playgroup. I was ready for anything!

And guess what! ETHAN DID AWESOME!!!! He barely needed his OT items except for sleeping & during the graduation festivities. But traveling in the van, he didn't have any behavior problems! He just chewed a lot. But, he was super content with his DVD player (which is strange because he doesn't really watch TV at home), and his iPad games/books. I am so glad that we took him with us! We had a great time, and it was a victory for our family! YEAH!

Here are some pictures from our trip!

Corey driving & Uncle Scott navigating

Aunt Rachel reading & Ethan. He has a pacifier because he was chewing on his fingers & this was the only oral toy that I had in my purse at the time.

 

Ethan watching his DVD player. The cookie sheet idea was from my friend, Jessica. She directed me to this website where you can do all kinds of things with the cookie sheet for travel. It was the BEST IDEA EVER!

Ethan's cute feet!

 

Both of the boys had their own DVD players & headphones. Here they are enjoying a snack (with magnets on the bottom of their snack containers to keep them from spilling) while watching their favorite DVDs.

 

My nephew hamming it up for the camera...I love it!

Both boys were restless before the graduation ceremony started.

Corey took them for a walk around the gym's walkway.

Ethan playing with stickers during the graduation. He only needed his headphones during the music.

Dad is showing Ethan the words on his degree cover...and Ethan is reading it! We were trying to get Ethan to stand next to them for a picture.

The whole clan!